{love}13: chick flicks. rom-com. sometimes, it's just necessary.

Today was a long, busy day. 

The kind of day you want to end on the couch wrapped in your favorite worn blanket with a good movie on. 

To me, good movies are movies you've seen a million times but are just as good--or better with each view. There are a handful of movies out there that fit this bill, in my humble opinion. Most of them are love comedies. I know, cliché and typical...but I'm just being honest. There are exceptions (I also like movies based on true events, like Social Network = AWESOME), but at the end of {most} days...or weeks, I want love and laughter. Not karate, blood, guns, gangs, superheros, war and all the other crap that my husband likes to annoyingly blare from our surround sound. I want chick flicks that vary on depth....sometimes i'm in the mood for a deep, "thinking" flick like Pride & Prejudice and other times I want something brainless and fun like Confessions of a Shopoholic.

So, nights like tonight get me all nostalgic about my favorite movies...just thinking about them makes me want to clear my weekend and live off an endless bowl of butter-drenched popcorn and bottomless bottle of cab.

If only...

But to stay true to {all things love}, I have extracted my top 5 {love quotes} from a few of my favorites.

Some of them you may not grasp unless you've seen the movie. And if you have, chances are it will only make you want to watch it...

You're a romantic.

You have a {lyrical} soul.

You can love under the best and worst conditions.

Fever Pitch

I love that you get cold when it is 71 degrees out.

I love that it takes you an hour and a half to order a sandwich.

I love that you get a little crinkle in your nose when you're looking at me like I'm nuts.

I love that after I spend day with you, I can still smell your perfume on my clothes.

And I love that you are the last person I want to talk to before I go to sleep at night.

And it's not because I'm lonely, and it's not because it's New Year's Eve.

I came here tonight because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible.

When Harry Met Sally

"What do ya wanna be married to me for, anyhow?"

"So I can kiss you anytime I want..."

Sweet Home Alabama

You know, that moment when you kiss someone and everything around you becomes hazy. And the only thing in focus is you and that person. And you realize that that person is the only person that you're supposed to kiss for the rest of your life. And for one moment you get this gift. And you want to laugh and you want to cry because you feel so lucky that you found it and so scared that it will go away all at the same time. 

Never Been Kissed

[This one is just FUN...LOVE this movie!]

Andie: Unattached?
Ben: Currently.
Andie: Likewise.
Ben: Surprising.
Andie: Psycho?
Ben: Rarely, Interested?
Andie: Perhaps.
Ben: Hungry?
Andie: Starving.
Ben: Leaving?
Andie: Now?

I couldn't leave this one out, either...

Andie: Our love fern! You let it die!
Ben: No, honey, it's just sleeping.

How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days

There are SO many more...but these are definitely a few of my faves.

Hopefully this served as a reminder of what a healthy dose of chick-flick can do for a

bad day,

rotton mood,

no-good week or

lazy night...

best served, of course, with cookies, ice-cream, chinese take-out and wine....

{love}12: full-time friends...

"It's so much friendlier with two." -A.A. Milne

You know that you're friends with your husband when...

5. 

He/she is the first one you call with any news...

gossip, embarrassing stories, what's on sale at Safeway...

4. 

You talk in bed once you turn the lights off....

even if it's just about nonsense and

even if you are totally beat from a busy day.

3.

You "hang out" together...

you spend time doing a mutual enjoyed activity,

and have FUN doing it.

2. 

You can spend a Friday or Saturday night in,

 just the two of you...

and have a BLAST.

1.

You still flirt. 

Friendship? Yes, please. -Charles Dickens

Love11: Keepin' the {spark} post-baby

Having a completely helpless little human come charging into your life after living selfishly for....well, for me 25 years is, well, exhausting.

You quickly become overwhelmed with feeding, changing, bathing, cleaning, organizing, wiping, dressing, laundry, trying to sleep and trying even harder to adjust and keep that little person breathing, healthy, and most of all {happy}....
and for at least the first few days...maybe weeks....you often end up neglecting things you never dreamed you would such as your hygeine, appearance, beloved pets and even the (dare I say!) spouse.

The second that Kai came into our lives SO many things changed. Including our marriage. It's taken some adjustment on the good ol' relationship front, but we have ebbed and flowed nicely with the drastic life-change and I believe we have come out stronger, definitely healthier and a whole lot happier.

Sure, we can't up and spend a weekend in Seattle at the drop of a dime, we can't hit the town on a slow Friday night on a whim...but we CAN keep that flame burnin' bright in our marriage behind our tired eyes and drool/spit-up/poop stained clothes.

It hasn't come without adjustment, but here's, in a nutshell, how:

1. USE those babysitters!!!!!
It took me awhile to feel comfortable calling people up to take Kai for an hour or two so I could go to the gym or go shopping, or so G and I could go to dinner and/or a movie....but now, it's neccesary. I've learned that family wants and LOVES to spend time with your little bundle of joy and as new parents you, by all means should take advantage of that! Take a nap, go burn some calories, or most importantly get some quality one-on-one time with your man!!! Maybe you don't have family at your disposal...ask a trusted friend, maybe they have a little one and you guys can trade off for date nights?! You won't be sorry you asked...

2. Early bedtime, anyone?!
Kiddos need sleep...and lots of it. Studies show that they should sleep for up to 15 hours a day! Establish a bedtime that gives you and your man some consitant alone and unwind time. You'll be better parents, better friends, and better lovers if you get some time for yourselves each day. There are days I look forward to this time all day long (as much as I LOVE being a Mommy, some days are hard!!) Early bedtime for you kid(s) is a courtesy to them, and you!

3. Be {spontaneously} sweet.
Make an extra effort to surprise your spouse with something thoughtful--especially in those early days when baby demands SO much of the attention. Send a sweet text, buy a thoughtful little gift, snuggle on the couch, tell them what a great Mom/Dad they are and what a good job they are doing. I guarantee, if you make a point to tell your spouse that you appreciate them, you love them and a reason why you are grateful for them at least once a day that {spark} will NOT be doused by baby invasion...

4. Parent together.
I think sometimes Daddy's get left out...especially in those early days of baby (and even more so if Mommy breast feeds!) Make sure that you designate "Daddy" baby-related tasks, too! For example, while I am doing Kai's bedtime routine (bath, lotion, diaper, book) Gary re-fills his humidifier and makes a bottle so I can put him to bed. It's fun to partner in parenting. "Parent together" also means making sure you are on the same page about things such as early bedtime, feeding schedules, discipline, etc. As Jack Johnson sings, It's always better when we're together...

5. Above all else, have FUN!
Be silly. Make sleepless nights and zombie-like days funny. Laugh together at a shirt sleeve covered in spit-up, make silly faces and crazy baby noises TOGETHER. I'm not going to lie, being a parent can be tough at times, but laugh and love your way through the madness!

this is how Gary likes to wear his britches when he's washin' the dishes....!

Marriage is work.

Parenting is work.

Both are a work in progress, but I'd say we definitely got the "fun" part down...

Love{10}: Received advice on becoming a "wife."

I've never been much of a pack-rat.

I don't save much, as I consider myself a minimalist and HATE clutter. There is, however, one thing I DO hold on to and it's cards.

I LOVE hand written cards!

I've saved all of them....since HIGH SCHOOL. OK, I shouldn't say all of them, but all of the one's with meaningful messages inside of them.

I have a big plastic card tub and it's separated into two compartments. On one side are people's messages/letters/notes that I want to keep and the other side is the decorative/picture/quotes from the cards that I use to scrapbook and make my own cards.

Lately I've been attempting to make some kind of order of our guest bedroom, but most of my efforts fall short, as I end up finding something (on purpose, of course) to distract me from the actual act of organization.

And the other day it was the big plastic card tub.

I really do enjoy pouring over my old favorite cards. It's encouraging, heartwarming, tear-jerking and really, a big blessing. As I was {tearfully}devouring treasured hand-written birthday, graduation, wedding and baby shower messages I stumbled upon a stack of postcards rubber-banded together.

As I rolled the rubber-band off the dusty cards and spread them across the carpet, I remembered that they were from my wedding shower that my Mom and her best friends threw for me (back in April of 2007). They asked all of the ladies who attended to write some small piece of "marriage advice" for me on the cards (If you host a wedding shower any time soon, I highly reccomend this activity as a small gift to the new bride...)

What a treasure these are........

And it is now my pleasure to share with you just a {few} of my favorite pieces of advice:


"I discovered early on that men like to be right, so a good way to stop any argument is to say to him, 'you could be right....' It's worked for me for 61 years."


"Laugh together often and forgive, forgive, forgive."

 

"Speak life to each other!

Respect your husband and love him unconditionally.

Laugh alot and take time for each other always!"

1) Do things with your husband that HE likes to do, even if they aren't your favorite.

2) Pray, Pray, Pray--and not just for God to change Gary, but to change YOU!

3) Tell him often how much you love him and thank him for being a great provider!

"When life gets too busy, vacuum just before Gary gets home from work and it will look like you've been cleaning all day!"

"The most precious possesion that comes to a man in this world is a women's heart."

1. Put God first in your lives, He knows you best!
2. Make large decisions together.
3. Treat each other with RESPECT!

"Find Gary's Love Language and express love that he understands!"

"My best advice after 17 years of marriage is to try to

think like a man

for the sake of seeing his point of view. As much as you don't want to, it WILL bring peace to your relationship!"

 
"Speak words of life...build each other up...encourage, give praise and be thankful."

"Feed your husband before any major discussion."

 

"Choose your battles...don't let every little pet peeve get to you!"

"Love is a choice and each day with Jesus at the center your marriage will only grow stronger!"

"As you allow God to be in control of your life,

things will go smoothly and your happiness will only grow."

Ephesians 4:25-32 and Ephesians 5:22-33

"Take time to just enjoy each other and reflect

on all the reasons you love each other."

"Marriage is wonderful but it is also work.
Don't be afraid to ask for help if you need it!

"To make love last, put each other first.

Love, laugh and live for each other every day."

Perhaps a few of you who read this blog will recognize your specific advice to me...?!

I THANK you for it!

It is so encouraging and uplifting to get meaningful advice from such strong, inspiring women.

Reading through my cards (and wedding shower "advice" bookmarks) just reiterates how meaningful a heart-felt, honest message can be. As is evident here--putting a little extra effort into a wedding shower activity can bless and inspire the receiver for many years!

What a lot we lost when we stopped writing letters. 

You can't reread a phone call. 

 ~Liz Carpenter

{9} FUN & cheap dates!

This post is for the broke college couple, couple on a budget, couple on a limited income, couple on a savings plan for something fun, or just plain ecomonical couple.

Fun doesn't have to be pricey.

In fact, some of the funnest nights I've had haven't cost a penny.

Alki Beach, Seattle....one of G and my FAVE date spots :)

For those of you who don't like to drop a ton of moolah for a fun date, I've compiled a list of free and cheap date ideas:

1. GET OUT AND ENJOY NATURE!
Nature is free, beautiful and invigorating to take in with someone you love. Plan a day hike, build a fire by the river or beach--or your backyard, drive somewhere with a view and gaze at the stars, fly kites!, clean out your bread pantry and go feed the birds, start a vegetable or flower garden, go horseback riding, pack a picnic and venture out somewhere new and scenic and spend the afternoon eating, reading books and taking naps under the beautiful blanket of God's creation.

2. DIG YOUR APRON OUT AND GET IN THE KITCHEN!
Do some research and have a cultural culinary night---make Indian, Chinese, Japanese, African themed full course meal...but do the cooking TOGETHER! (Don't forget to find some cultural music to match your choice). Or, find something delicious to make together (think toffee, cookies, a cake) FOR someone else...and then suprise them with it together!

3. GET ACTIVE: THINK SPORTS!
Go on a bike ride (if you don't have bikes, borrow!), too broke to ski or snowboard? SLED!, go bowling, hit up the driving range, miniature golf, find a park with hoops and play some H-O-R-S-E and a little 1-on-1, take a new class together (think kickboxing, yoga, spinning, etc.), rent a raft, canoe, paddle boat, go fishing (or hunting, if you MUST...), find a fun nature walk and take your dogs along...

4. IN THE MOOD FOR ROMANCE?
Stay in, drop the kiddos off with a sitter and do a mini-spa night in your own home. Think massages, jacuzzi bath, candles, champagne...you get the picture. Cheaper than an actual spa date or fancy hotel, but all the luxuries of both in the comfort of you own home!

5. TAKE YOUR MIND OFF YOURSELF....AND VOLUNTEER!
Take few hours of your day and volunteer somewhere with your significant other! This not only helps others, it will really bring the both of you closer--and make you feel even better because you are not only spending time with each other, you are also helping others! Find a local soup kitchen or church that serves meals to the needy, spend some time at a nursing home or assisted living center, offer to help out with a church youth group or school club, find a community service project and make it happen together!

6. ENJOY THE LOCAL CULTURE
Call your local chamber of commerce and get the low-down on community happenings...chances are there is more out there to do than you think! Plan a trip to a museum or historical landmark, go WINE-TASTING!, take a cooking or hobby related class together, go sip coffee at a fun little local cafe or try out the new micro-brew at the sports bar and watch the game, or go to a local sporting event and cheer on your home team!

7. SCREW THE EXPENSIVE VACATION, GO ON A MINI-GET-AWAY!
You don't need to book a week-long vaca to Maui to get your travel fix. Try a ONE-NIGHT trip to a hip bed and breakfast (think Hood River, there are some AWESOME ones there!) or a camping trip!

8. SPICE UP ANOTHER BORING MOVIE NIGHT...
Instead of renting another movie and staying in, go grab brunch and enjoy a matinee together! You could also rent a serious or trilogy of movies and have a movie marathon, complete with take-out and numerous beverages of choice ;)

9. MAKE IT A COUPLES NIGHT!
Host a game night! Some super fun games to invest in would be Things, Apples to Apples, Taboo and then a few decks of good ol' fashioned playing cards (we like Nertz, Hearts, Poker....). Game nights are honestly one of my favorite ways to spend a Friday or Saturday night. You could also form a "dinner club" with a group of friends, and rotate who hosts a dinner once a week! Another fun couples date night idea is the Progressive dinner. The progressive dinner is really a forgotton event, and I would like to personally bring it back...

These are just a few of the hundreds of free or inexpensive date ideas...

if you have one to add that you don't see here, feel free to share!!

{Healthy!} Cranberry Orange Muffins

LOVE LOVE LOVE Saturday morning breakfast.

I was in the mood for something quick, easy,{portable}, fruity but HOT, and of course, healthy.

I took stock of the ingredients I had in my pantry and googled away...

I found this recipe: Healthy & Delicious Orange Cranberry Muffins (I made them without the walnuts!)

Sunshine, Saturday, {Delicious!}

Now I'm off to spin class at the gym! I'll be back later for today's {love} post...

8: To {become} Real.

"What is REAL?" asked the Rabbit one day, when they were lying side by side near the nursery fender, before Nana came to tidy the room. "does it mean having things that buzz inside you and a stick-out handle?"

"REAL isn't how you are made," said the Skin Horse. It's a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, ling time, not just to play with, but really loves you, then you become Real."

"Does it hurt?" asked the Rabbit.

"Sometimes," said the Skin Horse, for he was always truthful.

 "When you are Real you don't mind being hurt."

"Does it happen all at once, like being wound up," he asked, "or bit by bit?"

"It doesn't happen all at once," said the Skin Horse. "You become. It takes a long time. That's why it doesn't often happen to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don't matter at all,

because once you are Real, you can't be ugly except to people who don't understand."

-Margery Williams, The Velveteen Rabbit

This was one of my FAVORITE childhood books. I remember my Mom reading it to my sisters and I before bed, and crawling into bed with a sad, but good feeling.

I knew what Real was. I knew it.

Ever since I could remember, I'd slept with a polar bear named "Snowy" (original, right?) and a yellow bordered "blankie." Every night, they were there, in my bed. I slept with Snowy tucked under one arm and blankie twisted somewhere around me and in the sheets.

Snowy and Blankie were a fixture in my bed until (dare I say), I got married.

I swear. Even ask my college roomies...or Gary.

It wasn't like I cried when I had to spend a night without them, or sucked my thumb while holding them each night. They were just always "there," I had no reason not to keep them around...

I had changed houses, dorms, apartments and beds but thier feel and smell stayed familiar.

Once Gary and I got married and moved in together, and his fabulous California King sized bed became "our bed" Snowy and blankie moved from inside the bed, to the side of the bed, nestled between the headboard and my bedside table. Gary, of course made fun of me--kind heartedly, calling Snowy "dirty" and blankie a "rag," but never once ordered me to put them (or throw them) away.

I still have them, not in our bed or our room even. I couldn't bear to box them up like rejected toys, so I just store them up in Kai's closet with some other random artifacts of Gary and mine, that Kai may take interest in some day.

And as I revisit this passage, several years later, it still moves me...but differently now, at 26.

Snowy and blankie now sit, worn and proud, in the closet.

And just as they became real to me,
I now fall asleep in the arms of my husband,
and wake up each each morning to a love more {real} than the day before.

In laughter, tears, good times and bad...

Love {becomes}.

"I suppose you are real" said the Rabbit. And then he wished he had not said it, for he thought the Skin Horse might be sensitive.

But the Skin Horse only smiled.