5 simple reminders for Mom's who can't do it all...

1. Play.

overwhelmed by a cluttered house? a long list of chores or uncrossed off "honey do's?" dishes in the sink? dirty floors and counters? half-finished projects? tired much?

and guess who wants your attention when there is all of the above to be done...

here is my "cure" for an overwhelmed spirit. it's one word.

play.

just take a deep breath, let it all go and go change into some comfy sweats and sprawl out on the floor and laugh with your little(s). it quickly puts everything into perspective and before you know it your list isn't looming over your conscience.

like one of my first-grade students said when i asked her class "how do you have self-control to get something done that is not that fun to do?"

turn some music on and dance while your doin' it!

sometimes it takes first-grade thinking to make things feel do-able. kids are awesome at that.

2. Indulge.

but sparingly, of couse.

do i think McDonalds is a healthy, well-balanced dinner? no. but do we eat it every so often? yes.

do i make cookies often? no. but when i do, do Kai and i eat the dough until we are too full for an actual "baked" cookie? yes.

do G and i sometimes choose to leave town over the weekend when we know we have a million projects at home to work on? um, yes.

life is precious, and if we strive to live in a constant state of "practicality" we might wake up and find that life has passed us by and leave us wishing that we would have just taken that big trip, made that memory, tasted that delicious dessert and gone ahead and bought that big, fun "toy," whatever it may be...

i'm not saying to go nuts. i'm all for disciplined living. just don't let yourself be so driven by perfection or bogged down by your goals that you forget to live and make precious memories with your family and children while you can!

3. Take a load off.

this one is hard for me. but when i take a few moments to just sit and relax it's amazing how good i feel. it's like a power nap without sleep. weird, huh? but it works. on those busy days, i have found when i just take a few minutes to snuggle my babies on the couch or go rock on the porch swing in the sunshine i feel so much better about conquering the rest of my day.

oh yeah, and i should mention that this mental "power nap" should really be technology-free. just break away and listen to the birds and look at the sky and breathe (that's my yoga-speak coming out)...

your kids will thank you. they will feel you relax and probably behave better too.

4. Get fresh air, every day.

even on the gross, nasty, windy days. we almost ALWAYS get outside. even if it's just for 15 minutes. bundle up, hop in the stroller or wagon or bike or backpack--whatever mode of transportation you prefer.

just get outside. if you make fresh air a priority, your brain will make happiness a priority. same goes for your kids. it's how the learn to explore be creative!

and once you get in the habit of getting outside every day, your kids will hold you accountable.

before we even pull into the driveway at home, Kai will say "park today, mama?" or "you gonna run outside and me and sunny in stroller?" or "play in backyard?"

so if i'm feeling lazy and like i just want to kick back in my recliner with a box of cookies and tub of frosting i am quickly put back into check by my toddler.

...we can always enjoy the cookies outside, anyway (remember #2?)

as Ron Burgandy would say "I'm in a glass case of emotion!"

5. Give yourself a time out.

i hate that i sometimes feel selfish or guilty when i take the time to go up to Kennewick to catch a Bikram yoga class. but i LOVE that i have a husband who pushes me out the door, and mommy friends who are going with me.

sometimes i just have to foce myself to GO.

it's hard getting out the door, especially when one or both of the kids is fussy or doesn't want you (or your boobs) to go.

but once i escape into the quiet kid-less atmosphere, i immediately enter "re-charge" mode and come back rejuvenated and ready to tackle the chaos once more.

these mommy "time-outs" come in lots of packages. yoga classes, runs, coffee dates with friends, dinner/move dates with  G, wine/hot tub with nana....and when i'm really hurting, sometimes they consist of just a long hot shower or a tv show or two back in the bedroom with the door shut.

when these mommy "time-outs," like the child "time-outs" are used correctly (not overused or underused), results will be positive for everyone involved!

...



i don't believe in super moms, never have.

i believe in caffeine, girlfriends, a daily dose of post-workout endorphins and prayer.

lots and lots of prayer.



the cure.

today, in the rush of whisking sunny boo out the door in that grotesquely awkward baby carrier to her already strapped-in-the-carseat waiting brother i slammed the locked door onto my long maxi skirt. i was in such a rush that i actually tried to "power" it free. you know, like run/pull it loose. yeah, that didn't work. and it is a new skirt, it still smells like TJMAXX so, come on...really?! my coffee, however did NOT spill a darn drop throughout the whole ordeal, which is a good thing because Lord knows, i can't affort to lose a drop of that these days.

but i laughed.

and as i plopped myself down in the car and shoved it into reverse i felt happy and content to be late, a little bit sweaty, but on my way and under another beautiful sunrise.

and then after a hard morning at work, one where hope seems dim and the world looks ugly, i decided to let myself just sit down with my students and not lecture or teach or nag....just laugh. were things perfect? no. were they still behind on their work? yes. but we came together just as we were, to smile and be silly and for a moment in time, simply exhale all of life's pressures and disappointments. and it felt good. productive, even.

a few hours later i found myself getting my blood drawn for our school sponsored Red Cross blood drive, where i asked the lady if i could sleep while the blood was getting pumped out of my veins. she said i couldn't because how would they know if i was dead....that was a bummer, but really, to lay down alone--albeit with a needle in my vein--felt kind of nice. she wouldn't stop talking my ear off so i took that as a sign that she really wasn't a fan of me falling asleep.

and as i tried to keep my eyes open, i laughed.

and thinking about it all, about life, about counseling, about teaching and about motherhood--

laughter gives life.

i have found that when i can laugh in spite of the bags beneath my eyes and my milk-stained shirts and sweaters and my larger-than-life piles of laundry and the five HUNDRED cars and trucks all over my floors and my lesson plans gone off-topic and overlapped meetings and half-finished sent emails...

my perspective shifts.

and the simple act of me responding with laughter, to something that i very well could be responding to with tears, or anger, gives me joy...

and a joyful heart is the best medicine of all (Proverbs 17:22)