Saturday, May 4, 2013

faking smiles on bad days, bucket-filling & the secret to having a {happy} family

 
sometimes i forget about how my children really {watch} me.
 
 
that they can already imitate my expression.
 
my smiles and silly faces...
 
 
and that our expressions, our moods, our joy
 
--or lack there of--
 
are reflected back to us by our children.
.

 
so smile--too big and too much.
 
make silly faces with them. even after a long night or a long work day.
 
laugh, {really} laugh at their jokes.
 
turn the tv off. silence the buzzing iphone. "forget" where you put that to-do list...
 
and just be.
 
be with your babies, your teenagers, your spouse, your family, your friends
 
your loved ones.
 
...
 
i often encourage parents who are concerned with their child who seems depressed or discouraged about friends and/or school to try to over-love them.
 
encourage them often.
praise their strengths.
constantly draw upon the positive.
tell them you love them, and then again.
 tell them they are smart, special, funny, beautiful and unlike anyone else on the
ENTIRE planet. (!) 
tell them they were made for a purpose.
 
and i use the bucket-filling analogy:
 
fill your child's bucket SO full (with love and affirmation)
that when others make those inevitable withdrawls,
it is already so full,
it never runs dry.
 
...
 
but sometimes it's hard. when things feel hopeless and you feel apathetic and tired.
 
but guess what?
 
our babies, toddlers, teens, spouses, family pick up what we put out.
 
so for heaven's sake, smile at them.
 
even if it feels forced and fabricated...
 
watch them, hold them, breathe life into their spirits and
 
smile. 
 
it's like saying "I love you" but in laughter form....
 
 
 
and the return is {joy}.

2 comments:

Rick said...

Great stuff here Whitney!

Whitney said...

Thanks, Rick!